Things you didn't know about Bullying.
I was bullied for such a long time back in school: both primary and secondary school.
The thing is, I never really thought about it because a part of me had locked those horrible memories in one distant part of my mind, call it protective mechanism, coping mechanism, whatever, lol.
Ps a part of me thought bullying was only physical. I didn't know bullying comes in so many forms.
Just few days ago, my little sister was telling me about this girl in her class who brings swallow food to school and gets bullied for it. She was telling me how this girl brought Fufu and okro as her own breakfast and how another classmate, who is known to be notorious, brought this food out of this girl's locker and started showing it around the class, asking whose food it was, knowing fully well the owner of the food. I guess she did that so others would join her and laugh at the idea of someone bringing what she wants to school.
It is wrong, and it is plain bullying.
Bullying happens everywhere, everyday, even in the most unlikely places, and we must know how to stop it, and why we should, which is one of the reasons I wrote this article.
Also, I saw a tweet sometime ago. This lady came to brag on Twitter about how she used to treat Juniors in Secondary school. I've been looking for the screenshot, but sadly didn't find it.
So yeah, she wanted to use the post to brag, actually about the perks of being in a boarding school, and how she used to wait for Juniors to pass and she'd pour garri water on their heads from upstairs, or she would even call them downstairs and do that act🤦. Sad stuff, really.
I checked the comments, and I wasn't surprised. People really came for her, because she didn't even see it as bullying, she didn't see it as wrong. On the contrary, she bragged about doing it.
Lol, let's not even talk about what we faced as Juniors in the hands of seniors back in boarding school because, according to them: "my own seniors did it to me so I must do it to my own Juniors." And that, that saying led to a lot of tears, pain, loss of self esteem. It was their own validation, for doing evil to people who didn't even know anything about it.
I remember then when we'd do close to nothing, and be asked to fetch water with a fork – crazy, right. Some of us would have our provisions eaten and won't be able to say anything, saying something even made it worse back then. I could go on and on but I'll stop here. This is just to show you that bullying comes in different forms, some of which I highlighted in this article I wrote. You can read it here- https://medium.com/@gracemalikahuoiza/what-you-can-do-to-stop-bullying-12a7ad4792da
Oh, I know this lady. A very big bully she is. When I first met her, the way she acted rang off some bells in my head, I noticed the red flags. But I'm a very good observer, so I sat back and watched, I wanted to know if she was that way with everybody– belittling, always has something bad to say about everybody, and she does this so sneakily you won't even know what's happening. I think that falls under verbal abuse, in my article.
Thing is, when I'm done posting this, God help me, I'll send this post to her, and I'll let her know this part is for her, and she should change.
Few weeks back, I and a friend of mine from secondary school got talking about this some weeks back and it just turned on the lock my mind had protectively closed off. I never even realized the extent to which this thing hurt, lol who'd have believed I was bullied in secondary school? I was though, I was.
And when this friend mentioned some of those incidences, it took a while to remember because I'd shut it out.
Since that time we talked, I've been working on this article. I can say this is the article that's taken most of my time in all the articles I've written. This comes from a deep place of my mind.
I never even fully knew I was being bullied but that's what it is. We all know how mean children can be, even in the elementary stages.
I have a T shaped scar below my left eye which was gotten, quite funnily lol, but through fire in a way. When it happened, I think I was in primary 2 or 3. I changed schools around that time and in this new school, some of my classmates gave me the name "Letter T." Of course, it was all bants and jokes to them. I made myself believe it was, to me too. But it wasn't. It wasn't okay, to be tagged letter T whenever I was called out in class or I had to say something.
Of course, Primary school came and went and secondary school came. This is even the worst.
Amongst others, the names I was called most were oponiza and imuiza. These names were coined from my middle name, my Ebira name, Ahuoiza.
Yes, at first it was all fun and jokes but this time, I'd matured more than secondary school, yet I didn't say anything. Lol what could I have said? I was the new student with the big nose after all.
I remember once that they beat me! In Secondary school omo, I wasn't able to tell anyone since that time. LMAO yes in Ss1. I never quite got over it. I was always the outspoken o, bold one but deep down, I wondered if what other people saw when they saw Grace was the nose and the forehead. (there's a reason I love my nose so much)
It did affect me, but it doesn't anymore.
God! Am I grateful for growth.
I wrote part of this out of what I know, made more research and here it is.
An article I wrote on BULLYING. Here, you can know how to stop being a bully, how to know if someone is being bullied, how to help people that are being bullied, the numerous forms of bullying, the effects of bullying, what causes bullying.
I hope you learn something new from this. You can read the article here on medium- https://medium.com/@gracemalikahuoiza/what-you-can-do-to-stop-bullying-12a7ad4792da
I promise, you'll learn a lot from it.
I'll talk more on Bullying on my next podcast episode. I'll ask questions and get different views before I record, so anticipate my next episode, Wednesday, 6pm. https://anchor.fm/malik-grace0
To connect with me further, here are my links.☺️✨
This is my general link here: https://mainstack.me/shadesofgrace
My medium page, where you can read my articles: https://medium.com/@gracemalikahuoiza
My blog, here: http://Shadesofgracee.blogspot.com
My YouTube: https://youtube.com/channel/UCX0DffVGl58TBbkziWz7-_w
My Podcast: https://anchor.fm/malik-grace0
My Podcast IG page: https://instagram.com/gracescorner_?utm_medium=copy_link
Personal IG: https://instagram.com/shadesofgracee__?utm_medium=copy_link
My Baking Page IG: https://instagram.com/ahuoizabakes?utm_medium=copy_link
With love,
Shadesofgrace ✨.
Stop bullying today
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